i'd talk about the silverish lining, but i'm busy being blinded by the flash from your camera

dear tourists,

welcome to the capital of the (arguably) lone hegemonic power in the world. the cherry blossom festival started this weekend, and today was the season opener for the washington nationals. it's a lovely city we have here, isn't it? i like it too. however, i keep being reminded of living in new york. it's not so much that the city is like new york - the buildings are less tall, the sidewalks are cleaner, the restaurants aren't open nearly as late, the killer cupcake shops are fewer and farther between, and the metro is carpeted (wait - really? that doesn't seem economical or sanitary). now, don't get me wrong, i love me some new york. but people here are less vocal with their opinions of you. so when i almost ran over some of you who were standing three abreast on the escalators getting out of the metro and trying to catch my bus home, i had to think before i started yelling about GETTING OUT OF THE WAY, and DON'T FORGET YOU HAVE TO LET THE PEOPLE OFF THE SUBWAY BEFORE YOU GET ON. you see, here, it's called the metro. it's really a lovely city we have. but all those people in suits who are trying to get past you at 5:30 pm? they just want to go home. i did mentally curse the tiny little woman who was really busy taking pictures of her friend on the escalator (escalators! whee!) because i missed my 5:22 bus, and at 6:00 when no other bus had come because of all the downtown gridlock, i just hoofed it to a different bus line and sort of winged (wung?) getting home.

there is a good side to this however. the bus line that i took home is WAY nicer than the one i usually home, an will probably take it from now on because it's only like 1/2 block farther than my regular line. anyhow, please enjoy our lovely city, and remember to go INSIDE the train when you get on otherwise the people behind you can't get on, and the people in front of you can't get off.

and watch out for clear plastic babies on lampposts.

v/r,
heatherfeather